Trauma has a way of inserting itself into our lives in ways we may not fully understand. It’s not just the big, life-altering moments that leave scars—sometimes, the small , persistent wounds affect us the most. Many people go through life unaware that the symptoms they are experiencing—whether physical, emotional, or psychological—are linked to trauma. Gaining awareness of these symptoms can be a turning point, where healing becomes a possibility and a path forward, bringing hope for the future. As I started to understand my trauma, I realized that I wasn’t broken but surviving.
For years, I misunderstood my own trauma responses, thinking they were just “who I was”. But understanding that these responses were actually rooted in trauma was a pivotal moment in my healing journey. In this post, I’ll explore how trauma can affect us physically, emotionally, and psychologically and share how recognizing these symptoms can be the first step toward recovery and healing.
By identifying the symptoms of trauma—whether they show up as physical exhaustion, emotional instability, or racing thoughts—we gain the power to address them head-on. This awareness can unlock the door to healing, offering the possibility of a life beyond just surviving. Trauma doesn’t define who we are, but recognizing it can help us reclaim control over our lives and start a path to true healing.
Physical Symptoms of Trauma
Trauma can take a severe toll on your body, often manifesting as:
- Extreme Fatigue: This isn’t your usual tiredness. It’s a bone-deep exhaustion that makes daily tasks feel nearly impossible. Because I was so tired all the time, I had no energy to do anything outside of work. I often flaked on my friends, making plans then not showing up. After missing plans with friends, I would feel guilty and withdraw, convinced I was a burden. I felt like such a burden when I was depressed that I didn’t want to burden others and, thus, isolated myself. I get very moody when exhausted, making it incredibly difficult to be around.
- Sensory Changes: Stress can distort how we perceive the world around us. For me, there have been moments when hot water didn’t feel hot or sounds seemed distant and muffled. These sensory shifts are signs of trauma’s impact on the nervous system.
- Chronic Pain or Tension: Many people who have experienced trauma feel constant tension in their bodies, often resulting in unexplained aches and pains. The body remembers trauma, even when our minds try to forget.
- Sleep Disturbances: Difficulty falling asleep, staying asleep, or experiencing nightmares is common for people living with trauma. This can lead to further exhaustion and exacerbate feeling “on edge.”
Emotional Symptoms
Emotionally, trauma puts us through a rollercoaster:
- Intense Emotions or Numbness: You might feel everything all at once, followed by a stretch of emotional numbness. This back-and-forth can make it challenging to connect with others, often leaving you feeling isolated.
- Mood Swings: Trauma can cause rapid mood changes, from anger to sadness, without any apparent trigger. I’ve often felt this tug-of-war with my emotions. My romantic relationships suffered the most. I picked all the wrong people, often showcasing my trauma without realizing I was easy prey for predators. I was also selfish, and if my friends didn’t include me in everything, I would get upset and shut them out. Once, I got mad at a friend for changing her relationship status on Facebook before telling me.
My emotional instability led me to isolate further, and it lowered my sense of self-worth. When I felt my lowest, my brain did a good job convincing me that I couldn’t be loved.
Psychological Symptoms
Mentally, trauma shifts how we think and function:
- Intrusive Thoughts: These are dark, often disturbing thoughts that come out of nowhere and can be relentless. For a long time, I felt like I couldn’t share these thoughts for fear of judgment, but understanding that these are part of trauma’s hold helped me cope.
- Hyperarousal: Trauma can put your mind into overdrive, leaving you constantly on edge. Anxiety becomes the norm, making it hard to relax or trust your surroundings.
- Dissociation: Trauma can cause a sense of detachment from your body or surroundings. It felt like my inner child being in charge of my adult life while my adult self was sleeping. I experienced it a lot at work and often felt like an imposter. During a trauma anniversary, I couldn’t remember how to open the door to my office.
My Personal Journey
I didn’t recognize my trauma responses until my healing journey began shortly after my mother passed away. Her death hit me hard, and I fell into a deep depression. I felt an overwhelming pull into darkness—a complete loss of care for my life, a desire to give up on everything. That period reminded me of having CPTSD in college, where I struggled with intense feelings of hopelessness and fear. This time, though, something shifted.
The depth of that pain opened my eyes to myself in ways I hadn’t experienced before. I started questioning who I really was. For so long, I thought how I responded to stress or challenges was just part of my personality—being “strong” or “independent” was all I knew. But through reflection, I realized that much of it was a survival personality built by trauma, not a reflection of my true self.
As painful as that realization was, it was also exciting. For the first time, I began getting to know myself—the real me, underneath the layers of survival instincts. I realized that who I am is everything the world tried to shut out of me when I was younger. I started treating people differently. I went on an apology tour, reaching out to those who had toxic experiences with me. Taking accountability not only changed my relationships, but it also made me feel more connected to myself and others. My apology tour helped bring a new sense of peace about who I was becoming, about who I was underneath all the layers of trauma. I was honestly surprised that the people in my life remained with me through it all. It was my first realization of how deeply loved I truly was.
When my healing journey had just begun, I was often crying uncontrollably. One day, while on my knees, tears soaking through the exercise mat underneath me, I cried out to God about the pain I couldn’t bear. I felt immediately soothed and reminded that the only way out was through, and even through the pain, I was never alone—God was always with me.
Coping Strategies
To manage my symptoms, I rely heavily on my faith. I read the Bible daily so that God’s word is deeply embedded in my mind. One of my go-to verses is Genesis 50:20, which reminds me that I am part of something much larger than myself and that God will use everything I have gone through to help others.
Intrusive thoughts often plague me, but instead of engaging with them, I pray without ceasing. There has never been a time when I didn’t feel better after or while praying. Daily prayer and small groups at church help me stay grounded during difficult times. In the first small group I attended years ago, I asked for prayer to get through Seasonal Affective Disorder, which would shut me down during the winter, and it was the first season I didn’t experience it. I no longer feel isolated; instead, I take any opportunity to get prayer because I know, having lived it myself, that prayer changes everything.
Impact of Trauma on Relationships and Daily Life
The trauma didn’t just affect me internally—it impacted how I related to others. Emotional instability often made it hard for me to communicate with loved ones. Mood swings would lead me to withdraw or react more intensely than the situation warranted, which strained relationships. I would shut people out, not because I didn’t care, but because my trauma responses were taking over. Pushing people away felt so normal to me. I was so used to people coming and going from my life that I did what I could to kick them out when people were consistent. I would feel bad about whatever I said to the person—my hurt would spill out, and I would use it to hurt others in a way I am not proud of. Hurt people, hurt people. Healed people, heal people.
The emotional rollercoaster at work or in daily tasks left me feeling overwhelmed by even the simplest responsibilities. Hyperarousal meant I was always on edge, expecting something terrible to happen. It made focusing difficult, and I struggled to complete basic tasks because my mind constantly raced. This left me exhausted and feeling inadequate, further deepening the cycle of stress and anxiety.
Building trust in myself was a complicated process that took some time. I had to fight the reminders of who I had been. It took me time to rebuild trust and love in myself, but it was an essential part of my healing process.
Advice for Healing
- Be Patient with Yourself: Healing from trauma is not a linear process. There will be ups and downs, but every step forward is progress. It’s important to give yourself grace as you navigate this journey.
- Seek Community: Surround yourself with people who support you and understand what you’re going through. Whether it’s friends, family, church, or a therapist, having a support network can make all the difference.
- Turn to Faith: Lean into faith. Prayer, scripture, and community can provide immense comfort and strength when facing the darkest moments.
- Seek Professional Help: It’s important to recognize when you need more support. Therapy can help you develop the necessary tools to manage trauma symptoms, and there’s no shame in seeking professional guidance.
- Self-Compassion: Healing also means learning to forgive yourself for past mistakes, just as much as it means forgiving others.
Healing is a deeply personal journey. There is no set timeline, and going at your own pace is essential. What works for one person may not work for another, and that’s okay. The key is to honor your process and trust that you’re moving forward, even when it feels difficult. No matter how long the journey feels, the freedom and peace that come with healing are worth every step.
I encourage you to reflect on your own journey. If this post resonates with you, consider reaching out to someone for support, whether a friend, a therapist, or a faith community. You don’t have to walk this path alone. Healing is possible, and together, we can thrive.
Share this post with someone who might need it, and let’s continue building a community where healing is possible.